Things I’d rahther do instead of watch The Detroit Pistons

by | Dec 7, 2014 | 15 comments

Things I'd Rather Do instead of Watch the Detroit Pistons

Any #Pistons fan can tell you that this so-called “Season of Hope” has turned into a demoralizing joke. The straw that broke the proverbial camel’s back for me happened Saturday night when Detroit couldn’t muster enough strength to beat a team that is OPENLY TANKING. After the Sixers loss I’ve decided there are so many things I’d rather do than watch The Detroit Pistons play basketball.

So I jotted down a few notes.

  • Vacation in North Korea.
  • Get stuck on an airplane in the middle seat, with 12 crying babies and the people next to me take their shoes and socks off.
  • Drink from a water fountain in a kindergarten class.
  • Lick the armrest of a chair in a hospital waiting room.
  • Wait in any Black Friday line.
  • Watch a Kardashian’s marathon.
  • Go to a One Direction concert.
  • Get a Colonoscopy.
  • Walk in a MMA ring during a fight.
  • Spend the day with Nancy Grace.
  • Do the Cleveland Cavaliers laundry.
  • Join the cast of Swamp People.
  • Get in an elevator with Ray Rice.
  • Eat roadkill with the Duck Dynasty crew.
  • Piss off Bill Laimbeer.
  • Take pictures of my food and post them on Facebook.
  • Work for Donald Sterling.
  • Be Josh Smith’s long distance shooting coach.
  • Give Dennis Rodman a pedicure.
  • Take on Rasheed Wallace in a game of Horse.
  • Have a drink with Bill Cosby.
  • Send my kids to The Honey Boo Boo day care center.
  • Get a paper cut on my eye.
  • Contract Ebola.
  • Rather be at the Malace at the Palace…again.
  • Wear sandals with socks.
  • Be Ron Artest’s psychiatrist.
  • Be in the path of a Blake Griffin dunk.
  • Help Shaquille O’Neal apply his Gold Bond.

I think I’ll be adding to the list as this season goes on. The only thing I wouldn’t want to be doing is be in Stan Van Gundy’s shoes.

Back to today’s programming. Kim Kardashian speaks to Pistons fans who actually have faith in a Detroit turnaround.

Kim Kardashian On Crack
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  1. Hristo Hadzhikolev

    Well , I am a relatively new fan (from 2008) so I wanna ask , was it that bad , like , ever?? I know about the theal era but I just cannot imagine it being much worse than today…Whaz is it now , 4 years of complete suckage , or is it 5 already…Nat , I have visited this site since 2008 , although not beeing much vocal , and I have noticed that zou allways seemed to stay optimistic , well reasonably 🙂 . But now I cant even hold my anger.After watching the game last night the only thing i could say and repeat is ,,They dont deserve us…“ The things that I saw , bad habits like no energy and no sence in the game… what can I say , I´ve been watching this for 4-5 years now and its starting to get irritating…

    P.s. Sorry for my bad english , I come from Bulgaria 🙂 Cheers!

    • Natalie Sitto

      First off great english and glad to see a fan from Bulgaria. Let’s just hope they can keep you!

      It was pretty bad years back “the Teal Years” but considering the roster this team shouldn’t be this bad. I’m still an optimist, but it’s been like therapy this season just speaking my mind. They suck…I can’t hide it so I’ll make the best of it by maybe making a few people feel like their not alone and maybe bringing some laughs.

      • Hristo Hadzhikolev

        Thanks for your answer , Nat , thats what I love about you the most , you always interact with people here and don´t consider yourself more than everybody else.And don´t worry , I don´t think there is a reason to think that they are gonna lose me , it´s an unexplainable feeling to root for the Pistons, considering their history 🙂

        With that said , it´s still really hard to watch games where you are sure that the players aren´t following the coaches gameplan , I mean… J-Smoove…. what is this. Is he really that stupid , Jennings …. I have no words . Here , in Europe , we watch soccer and if a player is doing something stupid continiously the team gets rid of him. Here ,it´s like watching a bunch of monkeys just dribbling a ball…

        I´m really sorry , I don´t mean to vent like this , but I have really studied the history of the Pistons and the NBA as a whole and I just can´t hide my disappointment , when somebody isn´t playing with passion and understanding , that he got really lucky , earning millions for doing what he ´presumably´ loves.

        I wish you all the best , Nat! 🙂

        • Ben

          Hristo you are spot on. Natalie, you too. I have been a fan since 2004. I’m not a bandwagoner though, I was 9 years old and they hadn’t been introduced to me until they won the Championship. I honestly don’t remember watching a basketball game until game 5 of the finals when we brought home the trophy. That moment when Richard Hamilton was at the free throw line and the confetti was coming down was an experience for me like none other. I have been a die hard Pistons fan ever since. Win or Lose they are my team. These past 6 years have been tough though. This year was supposed to be better and it’s not. Although I haven’t given up a potential season saving roster move. I know that we can be better. This is the most talent we have had in 5 five years and the worst record in a long time. Possibly the worst start ever. I think that we need to make a statement. Josh Smith doesn’t listen to Stan so we just need to waive him. Quit holding out for a trade just ask him to turn in his jersey. I think Brandon Jennings can be a problem but he seems to be doing well. He listened to Cheeks so I think Van Gundy can get his attention. Then maybe Moose will resign if we get rid of Josh. If not, oh well, draft a Poward Forward and move on. Find people that want to play for Van Gundy and with each. Teamwork over talent. That sums up the 2004 and 2014 finals (not saying the Pistons and Spurs weren’t talented)

      • Ryan C

        The true tragedy is that poor Keith Langlois, George Blaha, and Greg Kelser have to keep (somewhat) optimistically commenting on what is on track to be the most embarrassing season in Pistons history. I have to admit that I’ve been foolishly waiting on a turnaround, but I am DONE watching until something changes. I guess League Pass was a poor investment this year…

        • Markov7

          my friend its easy< to be general after the battle but i must add when they won pre season game against sixers with 109-103 i believe i smelled somethin fishy – i mean really how can sixers score on u 103????

    • Markov7

      man i ve been on bandwagon since 1989 now id rather watch croatian soccer league than pistons game thats how bad it is

  2. ericdtaylor

    The thing about that sixers loss is that Josh Smith actually had a pretty good night, he shot more than 50% for the first time in I dunno, months, years, a long time, he only took a couple long 2’s shot 50% from 3, 7 assists, 8 rebounds, 5 turnovers but that is not bad for someone who is our primary option on scoring and our primary option on assists.

    The troubling thing is that this is what SVG thought would happen. he would make Josh Smith into a better player. Well, Stan you done it. Josh is playing better. And we just lost to the worst team in the history of basketball. What’s your next move Stan? I don’t think there was a plan B. His plan A was make Josh better, let greg walk, and there’s no plan B.

    Well now we need a plan B. Because making Josh into a better player doesn’t make the pistons good, they are now worse than they were under Mo Cheeks.

    To be honest I think we will make the playoffs. Not because we are good we suck and will suck all year. But the east is pathetic. The lakers are undefeated against the eastern conference and have only 1 win against the western conference, this disparity is bigger than it ever has been, the west is far stronger than ever before and the east is historically awful. so I think we will get in eventually.

    I don’t know if I can watch any more of these losses though. At least SVG is being paid to watch this team.

  3. terry

    You say Detroit lost to a team that is openly tanking, well i think the pistons just might fall into that category as well and though they might not be able to out tank the tankiest team in nba history, they can still be a close 2nd. last i checked theres a really nice sf out arizona we could use, and the league should be done hooking up cleveland with number 1 picks for at least a year or two. Not to mention that nightmare of a trade that made ben gordan even more stain in the eyes of piston fan is in the past. This year more than any of the recent years is a true rebuilding year, so trades need to be made, free agents need to be dealt with, and a top three pick is damn near critical. Making the playoffs would be a disaster at this point, because there is no team in the league they can beat in a 7 game series.

    • Otis

      I don’t think you could ever say the team is openly tanking. They’re just so terrible it’s impossible to tell the difference. But I am 100% sure Stan wants to win, or at least wanted to until this stretch where the team lost to Boston, LA and Philly. Once that happened, all bets are off. Fortunately Stan hasn’t been mincing words lately, and I actually think he knows what has to be done. But to this point the Pistons haven’t been tanking, they’ve just tanked.

      Also, making the playoffs would have been a disaster for the past several seasons, because there is no team they could face in the playoffs that they could beat in a 7 game series. This year making the playoffs is nigh impossible. I don’t even think Stan has a glimmer of hope that making the playoffs is anywhere near the realm of possibility. Again, I’m hoping with all my might that Stan has the stomach to do what needs to be done. It’s not like having a fire sale could possibly make things worse.

      • ericdtaylor

        what has to be done otis. Greg monroe is gonna walk I think you wanted to trade him as early as last year that would have been nice to get value for him now we get nothing.

        I assume you want to keep josh smith pair him with drummond, of course that’s what we have been doing and it’s been a disaster. What’s next?

        • Otis

          Hey for starters, I wrote a piece here last February explaining in the clearest possible terms that this team needed to trade Greg. I didn’t see one other article anywhere that was nearly as direct. Believe me, I know as well as anyone how badly this team needed to trade him and how worthless he is now.

          As for pairing Smith and Drummond, I don’t know what you’re getting at, but I’d probably want to keep Smith because you can’t get any value for him. Smith is already here, and the team’s not going anywhere regardless.

          What’s next? Trade literally anyone who has value. Even see what teams would be willing to trade for Drummond, who is in line for a big payday after next season. Blow the whole thing up, come into the summer with as many picks and prospects as you can and build a team the right way.

  4. Ryan C

    Things I’d rather be doing than watching the Pistons SINCE waiving Smith: NOTHING

    • Natalie Sitto

      Agree! I knew Smith was an issue but not this much!


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