Bill Walton Is A Tool

by | Mar 22, 2006 | 19 comments

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Why does ESPN, an honorable sports broadcasting network, continue to allow Bill Walton, perhaps the most biased and belligerent commentator in the history of professional sports, to anchor NBA games. I was looking forward to the March 22 Heat Pistons match up for weeks, but when I tuned in and heard his awkward ranting, I knew it was going to be a long game. By the end of the first half, I was watching the game in mute. This man is so blatantly against the Detroit Pistons that it could not be more obvious. In the 4th quarter, I turned the volume back on and wrote down some true Bill Walton gems for you to enjoy. That guy needs to hang toilet paper from his neck, if you get what I’m saying. I will personally send a Need4Sheed.Com t-shirt to the first person that successfully starts a petition to get Walton prohibited from announcing any more Pistons games with at least 50 signatures, so let me know. Let’s take him down Pistons Fans!

Detroit closes off a big deficit, not one comment about the comeback. 62-60 Miami in the 4th:
“This is a DISASTER for Detroit. What are they doing? They need to inbound the ball!” (Awkward silence from co-anchor)

TIE game 64-64 in the 4th:
“Miami with a clear edge here, Antoine Walker is dictating the orchestra (Walker proceeds to throw up an air ball).” Silence from Walton and muffled snickering from co-anchor.

Pistons take biggest lead of night 70-66 in 4th:
“This is classic Detroit strategy, make Shaq play great, which he will, and make him pass to everyone else.” (No comment from anchor, Walton enters Guinness Book for saying dumbest, most incoherent comment of all time)

Need4Sheed reader Just Shu pointed out something Bill said that I missed when I had my TV on mute.
“You look at his body, Dwyane Wade, it’s as if Michelangelo sculpted it in a dream, he’s just so cut, and his posture, the rack upstairs with those shoulders, so broad.” Needless to say Just Shu wanted to puke, and so would I if I heard that one!

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Billy Billups


  1. yessir!!!

    Thank you for this, it is wonderful. As i was watching the game, i turned to my brother and said, i hate bill walton. He does hate detroit, but then again, not many people respect us. Every espn guy picked the heat to win. I just found your site acouple months ago and it is my favorite site. And with this blog about bill, i like it even more. Go pistons, yessir!!!

  2. Just Shu

    You must have missed the part of the game where Walton expressed his man love Wade – He was talking about how great his body is, said something like ” this is a body michealangelo would dream of” Mentioned his strapping chest and broad shoulders.
    I wanted to puke

  3. Travis

    Bill Walton truly is horrible. Thank you for reiterating that, I share your sentiments whole-heartedly. He is a miserable commentator.

    My favorite quote from him during a Lakers game:

    “What is Luke Walton thinking?”

  4. Devin

    no doubt, “his body looks like something michaelangelo would sculpt in the heavens/ dream”

    that was sooooo gay. me and my dude were cracking up…

  5. Ree

    i’m so sorry you had to watch the game with him!!

    i cant stand him or his son. i was watchin the wheel of fortune NBA week, and they were both on the same episode, i couldnt do more then 5 minutes.

    i Think our commentators are the least biased ones in the NBA, they give credit to whoever it due.

  6. Natalie

    I was thinking that too Ree that Bill and George always comment on how good the other teams is doing. They always give due credit unlike most announcers from other ball clubs.
    Thank goodness I was not forced to watch the Pistons on ESPN!

  7. Jennifer

    I couldn’t agree more!! Sadly, I had to watch the game on ESPN, and for the most part I just watched it on mute…can’t stand listening to him!

  8. Anonymous

    lol its getting to the point were i cant even watch espn. that lisp is haunting my dreams

  9. Anonymous

    I been a Piston Fan from 1985. I went to the Heat game at the Palace yesterday also. I’m from Chicago so I had to live through all of that horrible Michael Jordan nonsense, cheating and favoritism from the refs and the commissioner. But you all are to Pro Pistons on this site. Open your eyes to other peoples point of views, even if they may be wrong or off the wall. Everybody isn’t supposed to be a Piston lover, only the true fans, which are us. You all on this site have too many issues with Legler, Fred Carter and all these other people whi don’t see the same greatness in the Pistons that you see. Expand your horizons, stop thinking in such a limited capacity people. You have to evaluate everyones opinion, whether you like it or not. Pistons are representatives of God. To show this world teamwork and complete unity and cohesiveness. Now if most of America agree with the war in Iraq, as they do or they wouldn’t have re-elected Bush. What would make you think they see the teamwork and unity of the Pistons. Think Please. Face it, this is a selfish world, that’s why Kobe and Jordan are idolized. Sports is always a reflection of our society, check any era of any sports. Whatever was going on in society at that time, it was happening in sports at that time. Learn to look at things from other perspectives. No tunnel vision please. Go Detroit.

  10. Anonymous

    I hate bill walton,everygame hes an announcer he puts down the pistons,screw him hes gay

  11. gongon

    the reason we hate tim leger and bill walton is there retarted. They cant give one complement to detroit and find ways to put them down all the time. Last night all walton was doing was sucking shaqs dick all night and mimia for that matter. I wouldnt have mined as much but i dont think he gavce one complemtent to the pistons all night. Thats what makes us so mad is people find it hard to give the pistons the respect they deserve. i guess when htey win the championship this year they might get it, maybe not walton tho, shaq is a pussy as well, making an excuse for his finger. Hey shaq grow a dick ur injury was a joke yesterday i lost alot of respect for u and espn for that matter for making it a big deal. Its just sad.

  12. jeb

    how many times do i have to curse the name of bill walton before espn takes him off the air? for god’s sake espn, how many hundreds of thousands of people were watching that game? take a step forward in the progression of your anchoring staff, and get that hippie bastard out of there!

  13. Anonymous

    usually I just wtch the game on espn just to get a little comedy out of all the stupid shit walton says

  14. KRG from the MIZ

    Walton quote from the Lakers-Rockets game on Sunday, April 2:

    “The Lakers are leading in a team game. They are just letting Yao roll and letting the home crowd take hold.”

  15. matthew

    “boris diaw runs the high post offense better than anyone in the NBA”

    -bill walton

  16. GoPistons!

    I hate Bill Walton. Yes, he is the most biased commentator ever. In the playoffs a few years ago, when Pistons played the Nets, all Walton could do is talk about Kidd’s “sparkling, stunning green eyes”. He made commentator love to Jason Kidd during the series. I remember one quote, “Look at Jason Kidd’s sparkling green eyes gazing down the court”. How sick…

  17. GoPistons!

    I hate Bill Walton. Yes, he is the most biased commentator ever. A few years ago when the Pistons had to play the Nets in the playoffs, all Walton could do is talk about Jason Kidd’s “sparkling, stunning green eyes”. Walton made commentator love to Kidd every game during the series. I remember one quote, “Look at Jason Kidd’s sparkling green eyes gazing down the court”. How sick…

  18. Diaperripper

    one of my favorite bill walton quotes during a lakers playoff game 2003: “Robert Horry is one of the top five defensive players of our era” co-announcer: “what are you talking about!? he’s not even one of the top five on the court!”

  19. Hajax

    Bill Walton is the worst. I’m thrilled that an honorable site like this recognizes it.

    P.S. I just saw the WU-TANG Clan tonight in Phoenix and every time Method Man was on the mic it looked like Rasheed spitting salty-smooth rhymes.

    “Piston Clan ain’t nuttin’ to F–K wit’!”


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