With Cleveland comes Varejoke

Posted · 58 Comments

The Pistons face the Cavaliers in the Eastern Conference Finals. What does that mean for the Pistons and their fans? It means that Detroit will be subject to one of the most annoying players on the planet, Clownfish Varejao.

In Cleveland he’s known for the energy he brings off the bench. Just about everywhere else Sideshow Bob Varejao’s game is nothing more than a mop top flopping all over the floor.

Around these parts Varejao isn’t well liked, in fact outside of Cleveland he’s nothing more than a clown who’s idea of playing defense is trying to draw charges.

So Pistons fans, get ready for The Flopper.

58 Responses to "With Cleveland comes Varejoke"
  1. Anonymous says:

    he is the kid on the court whos over hustle takes the fun away from everyone else, though not as much of a bitch as bowen and ginobli are going to be

  2. Anonymous says:

    sorry thats over hustle and LACK OF SKILL

  3. Anonymous says:

    his constant flopping really gets on my nerves. He got on my nerves so much last year because it seemed as if every other called was him drawing a charge or shall I say flopping and getting the call. I know everybody flops, but Varejo and Hinrich are the two should be banned oh yeah and DWADE.

  4. Jamie says:

    absolutely love the flopping image Natalie! :)

  5. Justin says:

    Nat that’s very, very funny. I know not many people outside of Michigan like the Pistons but I am so sick of all the Lebron love. 1 man can not win a championship. Noone else on cleveland scares me, well except for drew gooden and that STUPID bunny tail thing. What is trying to do? Does he know he looks like an idiot?? Maybe after the Pistons knock them out Sheed could give him a hair cut, matter of fact why doesn’t he just go Brutus “the barber beefcake” and take out that other morons hair (side show bob)?

  6. molly. says:

    me and my friends call varejao one thing–vare-HOE. i hate him with a passion, and pretty much hate(wait i dont pretty much hate, i do hate) all the cavs-and i watched last night on ESPN news, all of them saying how much they hate losing to us, and how its not going to happen again..yeah right!!

    Pistons in 6 baby!!

  7. Anonymous says:

    Yeah, Me again. Varejao’s nothing but a piece of trash in my book. ‘Sheed’ll tear him up like a piece of copy paper from Staples.

    Varejao’s a disgrace to real players, like Kobe Bryant or Steve Nash or even Chris Webber, to name a few.

    We have to watch out for this loser, LeBum, and Sasha Have NoS&*%.

    Molly, I’m loving your post:D

    -KollinNaples, Pistons fan from Cleveland

    DESTROY THE CAVS!!!!!!!!!!

  8. John says:

    Excellent post.

    I strongly dislike VareJao. His reputation at “being the best at drawing charges” has become the reason why he gets so many calls, even though 85% of the time, he’s either a) still moving his feet and/or 5) obviously flopping.
    Watching him play makes me want to pull my hair out. He’s like a combination of my least favorite players: Bowen,Ginobili,Raja, etc.

    I hope the NBA starts giving techincals for flopping next year. I heard they were going to do a study on flopping, particularly the worst offenders. If Varejao isn’t on the top of that list, that something is SERIOUSLY wrong.

  9. Sam says:

    Has anyone else noticed how much Varejao looks like WWE wrestler Carlito? Google the name if you don’t know what I’m taking about! Identical!

  10. John says:

    You guys are right. Varejao’s the worst. All that energy, trying hard, and unselfishness. It’s terrible for the NBA.

  11. Sam says:

    Darren – looks like i missed your comment! Dude, you’re right they are the same person.

  12. Beth says:

    Varejao does look a lot like Carlito.

  13. Anonymous says:

    Here’s a side by side of Carlito and Varejao for anyone who’s interested…

    http://i26.photobucket.com/albums/c135/hardyzrulev1/Varejao-carlito.jpg

  14. Justin says:

    Are we SURE they aren’t the SAME person? Have we ever seen them in the same place at the same time?

  15. jessi says:

    wow are they twins? They look like the same person.

  16. Willis says:

    I am a pistons fan in columbus,Oh and im sick of all the cavs fans here hyping this clown like hes the next carlos boozer, and the team for that matter. I hope the piston stomp those chumps n 5 so all these cavs fans can finally realize cleveland’s not SHIT!

  17. Anonymous says:

    You’re also just jealous of “VeraJoke”. You’d love to have him on your team. Admit it! I can’t stand Sheed’s crying and bitchin and technicals, but I’d take him in a second. Same with Bowen. The whole charge thing in the NBA is a joke anyway. Most of the time players are moving their feet, but if they are outside the circle, they still get the call. I hate the call, but you can’t fault a player for using the rule to his advantage.

  18. GMoney says:

    Go figure, Pistons fans watch pro wrestling.

    As a Cavs fan, I can see how AV can rub you the wrong way. But he plays hard every night, goes after every loose ball, etc. I would take him anyday over a center who only shoots threes and leads the league in T’s.

    Who was the moron that said AV is a disgrace to guys that play hard like Webber??? Is this the same Chris Webber that tanked in Philly on purpose to get let go??? I think it is. He’s a jerk.

    And I’m actually quite surprised that all you Piston fans have the internet at the trailer park. Maybe next week you guys will all have access to shoes. Cavs in 6. Your reign of terror in the East is over.

  19. Anonymous says:

    Hey gmoney, think again !

    cavs are DONE in 5 or 6.

  20. Anonymous says:

    You dumb ass g money, pistons in 5 you need to stay off of pistons fans websites. go hang on LeBron’s balls

  21. Anonymous says:

    I’ll never forget a text message that my ex-girlfriend sent me last year during the Pistons/Cavs series. She was never a huge basketball fan, but she would watch it just because I was so into it. She didn’t know any of the players on Cleveland’s team besides LeBron, but she began to notice when AV was on the court. Here it is:

    “The Brazilian is a piece of shit.”

    Priceless.

    -Eric

  22. Amanda says:

    “And I’m actually quite surprised that all you Piston fans have the internet at the trailer park.”

    Imagine our surprise. Now all we is needin’ is one of dem talkin’ picture boxes and a cement pond and we be representin’ the redneck world real proud like.

    I guess blogging on Need4Sheed is just further evidence that Cavs fans want to be just like Pistons fans. And while imitation is said to be the sincerest form of flattery, it’s kind of getting old.

    This Varejao stuff is just for fun, gmoney. Frankly, it doesn’t matter if Varejao flops or is just a solid defender. The Cavaliers cannot and will not defeat the Pistons.

    I’m not gonna lie, Natalie. That graphic creeps me out. lol

  23. Davi Alexander says:

    Hey, I´m a brazilian detroit fan since the bad boys rock it everyone down back in the eighties, stupid people cheered for lakers and kareem, while me and 2 other kids in the country liked the pistons, enjoyed the defense underdog style.

    We, in Brasil, also think that Varejao is pathetyc, ridiculous and grotesque. He broke some greek player´s nose in the last world´s fiba championship. We are very worried with his horrendous performance and style representing our country in the NBA. Watching out Barbosa and Nene and you can see that we have good and real players, not some flaw-guys like Ginobili, Bowen and Varejao, they are disgusting and really deserve to get called technicals.

    Remember, Brasilian people also HATE Varejao, we´re ashamed that this kind of shit represents our country, we´re not that shit, please don´t think that.

    Go Pistons, break this idiot in two parts and then hammer Duncan forever.

  24. Amanda says:

    On a lighter note…

    Chris McCosky, Detroit News:

    “Rasheed Wallace just sort of tossed it out there.

    “Nazr’s going to get some burn in this series,” he said Saturday.”

    I certainly hope so. When he entered Game 5 of Chicago series I was so excited, even though we were down like 20 points. GO NAZR!

  25. amy says:

    That’s friggin hilarious!

  26. Anonymous says:

    you are all ignorant fans. You make fun of a player because he hustles more than anyone else on the court, and back it up by making fun of his hair. Detroit fans are used to seeing rasheed complain about everything and be lazy, so they aren’t used to a young smart player coming in and dominating a game

  27. Zeke11 says:

    Unfortunately the NBA is set up so that jumping in front of a guy and hurling yourself backwards like you’ve been hit by a car is a defensive maneuver.

  28. molly says:

    You’re also just jealous of “VeraJoke”. You’d love to have him on your team. Admit it!

    over-my(and i am sure every other piston fans)dead-bodies.

    why do we need a broke ass player when we have our bad boys..? oh yeah-we dont.!

    VER-A-HOE BLOWS.

    so does thier mr. potato head/al roker looking coach.

    gooo ‘stones.!

  29. Anonymous says:

    trust me, we are not jealous of him. Energy?!! YOU SHOULD SEE SHEED WITH ENERGY. When he’s mad, he makes every shot. 5 people can still be guarding him. sheed is the one who hussles.

    does anybody know if sheed hatess varajoke?! that would be funny cuz i no sheed probably makes fun of him.

  30. Anonymous says:

    varejao, ginobili and dwade are the biggest flops in the nba

  31. Anonymous says:

    haha i thought i was the only who thought that varajao looks like sideshow bob…seriously, can’t stand the guy

  32. Anonymous says:

    i hope he trys to flop on J max

  33. jessi says:

    I really hope nazr gets to play this series I can’t wait. I was also excited when he got time in game 5. I thin he is such a good player and will be cheering very load when he enters the court. We can us him in this series and I really hope what sheed said come true and he plays. I am so pumped for this game to start GO pistons GO

  34. t says:

    I don’t think he’s not widely like outside Cleveland. In fact I think a lot of fans like the energy he plays with and wish all players played like that. Yeah, you’re right, he might flop a bit, but this is the soccer influence. Manu’s dribbling reveals it and obviously the flopping is seriously influenced by it too. As an English guy in the States, it’s obvious. That said, can’t wait for the series, I don’t think Cleveland got a thing on y’all. I don’t think it’ll be close.

  35. Anonymous says:

    Davi Alexander,

    Don’t worry, I would never let one person influence my opinion of an entire nation of people. Brazil is a great country that I plan on visiting hopefully someday soon. Just because I don’t like AV as a basketball player doesn’t mean I don’t think he could be a good person. I’m sure he’s a good person off the court, and his family and friends should be proud that he’s making a living playing in the NBA. He’s certainly not the only player whose game I despise, however.

    -Eric

  36. steve g says:

    I don’t think he’s not widely like outside Cleveland.

    Awesome use of a double negative, t.

  37. Anonymous says:

    Remember Sheed last year after game six calling Ilgauskas “Ilgliskis” and Verajao “that Verajio cat”? That was the greatest!

  38. Anonymous says:

    To the commentor John, who thinks that “trying hard” and “hustling” in a game is flopping/screaming which HE* thinks is great for the game of basketball. I understand where you are coming from… I mean, flopping is probably the biggest hustle play in all of basketball right? Trying hard means, acting to get a call to go your way right? I guess Rosie O’donnel and Jim Belushi are great hustlers too. Because they are great actors, so yeah, sure… I guess you can say that flopping is a big hustle play… pshhhh yeah, right…. Flopping is probably the one thing in basketball that I hate most. Yes, there are people who bull their way to the basketbal and deserve the offensive foul called. However, all Anderson Var-eh-HOE does is fall to the floor because he knows nothing else to do. He cant block, he cant dribble, he cant shoot, he cant pass, infact he cant even learn to wash his hair/or keep it trimmed… So why not practice the one thing that makes the game a basketball a “pussy…cat” sport… I guess that fits Var-eh-HOE well, sorry to fill your heard with knowledge john, that wasnt my intention. I know its hard to learn something new every day for you Cavs fans. Cant even learn that you need a TEAM to win a championship. Oops, there goes my mouth again,

    Nick~~

  39. Anonymous says:

    Excuse my terrible english… “Fill your HEAD* with knowledge.”

    Nick~~

  40. Anonymous says:

    AMEN

  41. Anonymous says:

    Yeah, unfortunatly the Pistons have had to face the two worst floppers in the NBA today in Kirk Hinriech(sp?) And Varajnoa(sp?)

  42. Anonymous says:

    This is Nemo, my father and I are in serious discussion with some lawyer sharks on legal action of association this mop head with our noble species of clown fish.

    We broke box office receipt records, we have video games based on our experience.
    You red algae for hair have been warned, DO NOT GO INTO THE WATER!

  43. Anonymous says:

    one should be made like this for ginobili since he loves flopping as well. but, it needs to be one of those scum feeder fish cuz thats what ginobili equates to in the animal world

  44. Anonymous says:

    wow, bunch of haters who know nothing about basketball.

  45. Davi Alexander says:

    Hey, i said that i don´t like Varejao, even with him been a brasilian, I think he´s a disrespect to my country and basketball friends, who really play the game, or at least we try.

    Ridiculous scene of the year: Varejoke letting billups make the big three…, priceless!!! Thanx varejio cat!

  46. Anonymous says:

    To the anonymous at 8:10… Learn to speak english… “haters who know nothing about basketball.” I may not know everything about basketball, but at least I know proper english. It is, “haters who don’t know anything about basketball…” Just because we are poking fun at him, doesn’t mean we don’t know basketball… Get your facts straight kid.

    Nick~~

  47. Anonymous says:

    Gmoney (such a lame name I could barely bring myself to type it): “A center who only shoots 3’s and leads the league in technicals?” Obviously you’re referring to Sheed, so I should point out that he’s our power forward, not center. At least get your facts straight, dumbass.

  48. Anonymous says:

    Varejo dominating a game–now that’s a good one!

  49. Anonymous says:

    Vare-Fro is gay, he needs a hair cut and needs to stop copying wallace, ben. LeBron is a stupid nigger

  50. Anonymous says:

    whatever ben wallace’s hair hasnt always been a flippin fro so shut up!! anderson is soo hot and hes had that fro since well ferever!!! hes hott leave him alone cavs r gonna kick but especialy if lebron has a good game!

  51. Anonymous says:

    god stupid mcdyess? got kicked out for hurtin my baby!! ha ha

  52. Steve Z says:

    i think its funny that you guys joke about him… he sucks but thats beside the point…

    he’s about to go to the NBA finals to lose to my spurs babyyyy

  53. Anonymous says:

    ur spurs r gonna beat us the cavs
    i dont think so
    spurs get ready were comin fer yah
    after were done with these clowns the pistons

  54. Anonymous says:

    a ton of thanks to rasheed for running his huge mouth!!! we could of and wouldve done it without yah!! thanks to hamilton for fouling out and thanks to u pistons fans for non of ur support
    cavs r NUMBER 1 and chris webber:
    we’re the best athletes in the world not the PISTONS
    ha ha ha ha
    we r the eastern conference champions!!!!!
    thanks again and remember
    gooooooo cavs!!!
    ohhhhh yeeaaah!!!!
    spurs watch out here we come ur next 2007 nba CHAMPIONS
    ur CLEVELAND CAVALIERS!!!!

  55. Anonymous says:

    i actually <3 him... yes he's a flopper so whattt...HE'S A HOT SEXY BEAST and ur just jealous that the cavs made it into the finals but the pistons didn't... so ur taking it out on us and our players... and yeah im a cavs fan... yeah... i was so angry at mcdyess for doing that to him... YEAH EASTERN CONFERENCE CHAMPIONS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    CAVS ROCK ON… CANT WAIT TILL 2007/2008 SEASON

    besides u all are angry b/c u dont have andy (<3) on ur team!!!!!

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